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Know Your Fight Cycles

If there’s one thing Penn and I know for sure, it’s to not dive into deep conversations in the month of December. It almost always leads to an argument. We also try to avoid big discussions late at night when we are both tired. It never ends well. (For our relationship and my sleep.)

These are two examples of our fight cycles – big and small. Penn and I noticed that with the added stress of the holidays, travel, and visiting extended family, anytime we tried to discuss something important in the month of December it wasn’t productive. However, if we tabled those topics for later, we could come back to them with less stress and better communication. A similar strategy works for us with avoiding working out disagreements late at night. Believe it or not, if we go to bed angry we can work things out the next day with a much clearer perspective. 

So how do you know when you and your partner should avoid big conversations, and when you should resolve them?

Give Each Other Grace

This week, we asked our marriage coach, Dr. Christopher Edmonston, to join us on the podcast so we could get a tune-up on our relationship. Penn and I have been in an extra stressful season the past few weeks as we prepare for a new project along with the usual demands of work and the kids’ sports. We needed to be reminded to give each other grace and be ok with tabling large discussions until later. Our chat with Christopher could not have come at a better time. We hope by sharing productive ways to communicate with your partner, you can learn something to take back to your own relationship too.

Do you know what your fight cycles are with your partner so you can avoid them? Listen to the podcast and let us know what you think in the comments.