15 Things That Would Put My 20s Self Into A Coma

There are times, when I’m signing a permission slip or making some sort of parenting decision, when I step outside myself with wonder, “I can’t believe I’m old enough to make these decisions!” Yes. I’m deep into my 40s, but on so many days I don’t feel mature enough to do any of this. (Please tell me I am not the only one here – I get older and it still feels weird!)

There are days when I so clearly remember being in my 20s. In those days, I wouldn’t even start  my evening at midnight. Like, I wouldn’t even put on my “going out top” and low rise jeans until 11pm. I danced all night while working in South Florida and would watch the sun come up while leaving clubs while living in New York City.

In hindsight, I’m so glad I got to experience that side of the day because, at this point, there is a serious emergency happening if I’m still awake at midnight. I did “all the things” in my 20s. I made questionable decisions and I’m somehow still standing. But it makes me laugh to think about what I consider “fun” now. 

15 Things I Do In My 40s (That My 20s Self Would Never)

Here’s a list of things I do now that would send my 20-something self into a coma: 

  1. I have daydreamed about taking a week off work and organizing all the photo albums in my house.
  2. One day over the Christmas break, Penn and I got into bed at 7:37pm. We high-fived each other in celebration of this feat. 
  3. I have a text string just to exchange Wordle results. 
  4. I love to spend a Saturday cleaning out my closet. I can get ruthless and make monster donation piles. It’s thrilling. 
  5. I have said the following on more than one occasion: “It looks like we have rain in the forecast. Our grass needs it.” 
  6. I plan day-dates with my husband so we’re back home and in sweatpants by 5pm.
  7. I have a pillow system and without it I can’t sleep.
  8. I read the reviews for vitamins.
  9. I squealed, out loud for others to hear, when I found a sale on the clear organizational containers I needed for my pantry.
  10. I have donated most of my heels in favor of way more comfortable flats (or better yet, sneakers!)
  11. I used to get cardio from dancing until 4am, now I go for after-dinner walks “to get my steps in.”
  12. I no longer exist off gummy bears and Diet Coke, I now strive for the ideal amount of protein and fiber on a daily basis.
  13. I routinely go to two different grocery stores to get a slightly better price on meat.
  14. I play pickleball.
  15. I have a favorite water bottle.

How many of these are true for you? What other things did I miss?