Next year, Penn and I will have been married for 20 years. (I don’t know how this is possible considering, in my head, I am still 27 years of age.) It’s an incredible feat, but one that has come with a few bumps along the way–even some as we speak! Penn and I are in a very busy season of parenting right now. Having teenagers who are going to high school and soon to college can be stressful. In times of stress like this, I can see how couples fall out of “like” with each other.
Despite living, working, and raising kids together, there are days when Penn and I don’t talk about how we are feeling. We have to make time and space for that. Luckily, we are still very much in like (and love) which I am grateful for. With everything swirling around us, we both have to make a conscious effort to be more mindful of one another. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in everything else and forget that we are on the same team.
Like Someone At A Grocery Store
On this week’s podcast, we each give our Top 5 tips for “How To Stay In Like” with each other. One tip we talk about is being nice, or as Penn puts it “treating your partner like someone at the grocery store.” As humans, we save our worst for the people we care about the most. We do this because we feel comfortable being an unfiltered version of ourselves around those that we trust. Sometimes that behavior isn’t always healthy.
Knowing this, it’s important every once in a while to check yourself and ask, “Am I treating my partner with the same kindness and respect as someone I don’t know?” It’s a tip we talk about from our marriage book, Everybody Fights, which stemmed from couples counseling. Penn also talked about having each other’s back. Life can be stressful enough, so knowing there is someone who is always in your corner is reassuring.
Is A Frosty A Milkshake?
Upon reflection on our list, I felt guilty about what kind of partner I’ve been lately. As I said, this season of parenting is very busy and at times, stressful. I have been in my head and my anxiety has been higher than usual. Penn, of course, gave me grace and I am grateful for his kindness and understanding.
After our lists, we had some good laughs. Our producer, Ann Marie Taepke, joined the fun to play a game we call “Then!” where we (you guessed it) get way too competitive. Listen to the podcast for the full Top 5 list and our silly game. Very important: Tell us whether you think a Frosty is a milkshake or not and if Penn looks likeBob Barker in the aging booth app. Happy listening!
