| Sep 2020

Staying Positive in 2020

laughing holderness

Positivity isn’t my default setting. In a year like 2020 with coronavirus, natural disasters, and politics deeply dividing our nation, it is easy for me to slip into waves of anxiety and depression. Being an empath to a fault, I internalize pain and struggle to the point where it negatively impacts my daily life. Luckily I have a partner who can pull me out of this, because I married a human Golden Retriever. Penn is big, he’s hairy, and generally he is pretty happy. Like 99% of the time. So why not have him give us some tips to stay positive? It can’t hurt.

The funny part is that Penn has never given this any thought until the recording of this podcast. That’s how naturally being positive comes to him. We recently finished writing a book about marriage and one of his tips is something we learned in the book. The tip is that you have to occasionally check yourself and what mood you are projecting to those around you. 

Naming Your Feelings

Your mood is contagious. If you have a negative or pessimistic attitude, you are going to pass that on to the people around you. In fact, bad moods are more contagious than good moods. Scientific researchers call this phenomenon emotional contagion (EC) where one person’s mood can be transferred to another. 

If you do find yourself in a negative state, it helps to name the emotion you are feeling and talk about it. In a UCLA study, groups of people interacted with a large tarantula spider and were told to behave in different ways. Some expressed how they were feeling, some diminished how they were feeling, and some didn’t say anything at all. The groups of people later gathered again with the spider and the participants who expressed their feelings were less afraid of the spider. It’s important to name your feelings to help you feel better.

If you are struggling to be positive in 2020, give our podcast a listen and see what Penn positivity tips you can use. Do you have your own tips? Let us know in the comments! 

Libsyn: https://directory.libsyn.com/episode/index/id/15978704

iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-stay-positive/id1378725018?i=1000491302025

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/26eQaKsc5pkDrtEqnx7q7N?si=9f_xJCwwQp2LhFl7WRjbZg

Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/holdermess-the-holderness-family-podcast/e/77375830?autoplay=true
Pandora: https://pandora.app.link/08mMmWdyN9

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In most of our content, you see us having fun with, and making fun of, our family and our marriage.  There’s plenty to laugh at, there is also plenty to work on. This portion of our website is all about our ongoing quest to be better at being married to each other.  The content is a little longer form than the usual videos, but it will still make you laugh - and hopefully it’ll make you think a little!
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About Us
The Holderness family has been dancing in pajamas and singing during snow days for years — but last year they hit the record button on the camera and published their goofy video on YouTube. Penn, Kim, Lola, and Penn Charles continue to make hilarious videos around tent-pole events and circumstances most families face.