| Feb 2020

You Aren’t the Person I Fell in Love With


When I married Penn, I was in my 20s and I was a lot more fun. I had an entire section of my closet dedicated to “going out” tops. I was spontaneous and carefree. Late night dinners and nights dancing with friends were my idea of a good time. Then life happened. And just as items shift during flight, over time I shifted too. I became more honest about my feelings as an introvert and what made me happy. I took on more responsibility as a mother and a business owner. Even though Penn has changed too, I can’t help but ask – should I feel bad about not being the same person I used to be? 

Love Breeds Trust

Even though I have changed, I feel more comfortable with Penn now than I have ever been. I love him 100x more than I did on our wedding day. He’s seen it all—my highs, my lows, my cheetah flannel sweatpants—and somehow I’m still the hottest person on the planet to him. The longer you are in-love with someone, the more you trust them. For example, you know you can fart in front of them or clip your toenails and they will still love you. (This may or may not be a true story – you’ll have to listen to find out.)

As couples change over time, it’s important to find new ways to reinvent your relationship. Looks for ways to connect with someone using the marriage easy button, and keep lines of communication open. It’s easy to hurt the ones we love the most by taking them for granted. Using statements like “I feel” can help your partner understand your point-of-view in an non-combative way. 

Listen to this week’s podcast with our marriage coach, Christopher Edmonston, for more ideas on how to grow and learn together. How do you and your partner evolve together? Tell us in our Facebook Group! 

Enjoy the show! 

Google Playhttps://play.google.com/music/m/Dcsgzh56q65bnuxey6gitqsuc4e?t=You_Arent_the_Person_I_Fell_in_Love_With-The_Holderness_Family_Podcast

Join our podcast group on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2142828125983568/

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In most of our content, you see us having fun with, and making fun of, our family and our marriage.  There’s plenty to laugh at, there is also plenty to work on. This portion of our website is all about our ongoing quest to be better at being married to each other.  The content is a little longer form than the usual videos, but it will still make you laugh - and hopefully it’ll make you think a little!
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About Us
The Holderness family has been dancing in pajamas and singing during snow days for years — but last year they hit the record button on the camera and published their goofy video on YouTube. Penn, Kim, Lola, and Penn Charles continue to make hilarious videos around tent-pole events and circumstances most families face.