I have never been prouder of Team USA than I am this year. To be clear, I have binge watched every single Olympics since 1984. I watch everything – racewalking, speed climbing, archery, you name it – and I like to consider myself an aficionado. And I can say, regardless of medals, this is the best that Team USA has ever been.
These kids (I’ll say kids, because most are young enough to be my children) have been extraordinary role models for our country. Here are some lessons from Team USA. They are invaluable lessons, and in many situations, without even winning gold.
#1 How To Lose With Spectacular Grace by Simone Biles
I know, I know, finishing second isn’t really a loss. A silver medal is an amazing accomplishment. But when you are Simone Biles and you are from a different solar system than anyone else ever born, it’s about expectations. She was expected to win her final event, the floor exercise, and she didn’t. Rebecca Andrade from Brazil pulled off a stunner and won the gold medal. But Biles, who is mature beyond her years (she openly credits “going to therapy every Thursday” for all of her success) staged a choreographed “We’re not worthy” bow as Andrade took the top step of the podium, along with fellow American, Jordan Chiles.
“She’s so amazing,” said Biles about Andrade during a press conference. “She’s queen. She’s such an excitement to watch and then all the fans in the crowd, always cheering for her. So it just, it was just the right thing to do. She’s queen.”
I have never seen an Olympic “defeat” handled with such grace, positivity, and respect. Maybe it catches on in our youth leagues, our colleges, and our old man tennis leagues. (I’m in one.)
#2 How To Stay Curious by Kristen Faulkner
If you haven’t heard this story, it’s a doozy. Kristen Faulkner was a rower at Harvard. Not a cyclist, a rower. She went to New York and worked in finance. A couple years into her job, she took a weekend cycling class in Central Park and thought, “Hmmm, this is kind of fun! I’m going to try this more!”
6 years later, she won the flipping gold medal in one of the most grueling events in Paris: a 4-hour race through the city. The way she won is worth watching; with 3km left she vaporized the competition with a push so ferocious, the women chasing her LITERALLY GAVE UP AFTER ABOUT 15 SECONDS. (You can hear the commentator scream “No one is chasing her!” Kim was watching with me and was like “Why aren’t they chasing her?”) It was wild. They knew it was over.
Kristin is a shining example to our children that you can’t always be pigeonholed into one thing. The world has changed a lot lately; when I was growing up, you played three sports all through high school and everyone picked their major after your sophomore year in college.
Nowadays, kids have to pick a sport to specialize in when they are 8, and train year round just to make a high school team. (Or do they?) Kristen picked up a new sport AFTER COLLEGE AND WON A GOLD MEDAL. She certainly had the athleticism and the work ethic, but she also had the curiosity to look in a new direction and say “Hey, how does this work? What are the physics? What’s the strategy?” Bravo.
#3 It’s Not Over Yet by Noah Lyles
You guys, I’ve never seen anything like this. Forget how cocky and macho Noah Lyles is. Forget his boasting and smack talking. Focus on the last 30 meters of this race. HE WAS IN 5TH PLACE WITH 30 METERS TO GO. HE CHASED DOWN THE 4 OTHER FASTEST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD. NO ONE SAW HIM COMING.
It happened so fast, it’s hard to process, but this (in my opinion) is the greatest comeback in Olympic History, maybe in sports history. Better than Tom Brady down 28-3. Better than UNC down 8 to Duke with 17 seconds left before they had 3 pointers. He just didn’t give up, even when the outcome seemed so obvious, the announcer actually gave the Gold Medal to another runner, until a photo finish showed that Lyles beat him by the bone in his clavicle.
When my kids feel frustrated, behind, destined to fail, I will show them those last 30 meters.
It’s not over yet, so don’t give up.
#4 Your Most Important Job Is To Be A “Hype Man” by Katie Ledecky
I got teary eyed watching the end of the Men’s 1500m Swimming Final. Not because it’s unimaginably difficult to swim a mile at any speed. Not because Bobby Finke set a world record. It was because one fan in the stands was so unbelievably animated, screaming and flailing, eyes so full of passion and emotion, I thought she was going to pass out. The fan was Katie Ledecky, the greatest distance swimmer of all time.
She’s got nine gold medals, but apparently she enjoyed THIS moment more than any other at these games. She is close with Bobby, and trains with him at the University of Florida, so it’s understandable. Bobby cheered her on during her swims as well. They seem to have mastered something that Kim and I wrote about in our first book, Everybody Fights:
One of the essential roles—maybe the most essential role—we play for our partner is as audience to their life story. That is the core promise we make when we enter into the covenant of a long-term relationship: I will witness your story, I will listen as you grow and change and stretch.
These two partners have figured it out better than a lot of us married folks have.
#5 Define Your Own Success by the US Men’s Gymnastics Team
I’ve been working on this with my son (and I am proud of him for getting better at it.) Success for a lot of 8th grade basketball players is simple: Stats. Mostly points, maybe assists and rebounds, but stats. PC’s coach helped him redefine success away from just stats into: “What can I do to help my team?” Since making that mindshift, he’s been playing better, and how bout this? Since he stopped worrying about stats, his stats have gotten better.
You know you else perfectly defined their own success? The US Men’s Gymnastics Team. They KNEW they couldn’t beat China or Japan. So their one and only goal? To have the best meet of their lives, and finish in 3rd to secure the bronze medal.
When they did (thanks to a clinching Pommel Horse specialist who is a Rubik’s Cube Nerd and is now an American icon – you rock, Stephen Nedoroscik!) they lifted Pommel Horse Guy on their shoulders. They hugged with more ferocity than any men have ever hugged before. They wept and screamed and danced and hugged more.
Again, they finished 3rd. The teams that finished 1st and 2nd looked like they were attending a funeral compared to these guys. It’s because they defined their own success, and accomplished it.
What were your favorite moments or lessons from Team USA so far this Olympic Games? Tell me in the comments!
Update: We turned this blog into a podcast! Listen and make sure to tell us what non-Olympic “sport” you would medal in. Happy listening!
